Home > Hall of Fame > Second Floor > Inducted Posts > Weatherman's 96-97 G13 Forecast

From: Matt Parks
Date: Fri, 13 Dec 1996 13:21:11 -0800
Subject: Latest Forecast

Neighborhood - Blue Monkeys 0.5

Furious, after watching his goaltending partner give up five third-period goals to the Whalers, Vanbiesbrouck has to be forcibly restrained from ripping Mark Fitzpatrick's head off of his body. Doctors were still amazed at how Fitzpatrick's head got on Vanbiesbrouck's body in the first place, but it did explain how Florida gave up 5 unanswered goals. Since the surgery to reattach Mark's head to his own body was postponed, he was unable to start in the Panthers only game of the segment. (TSN's injury report listed it as "Goalie Mark Fitzpatrick (severed head) is available as a backup for Saturday's game against Edmonton"). Unfortunately, the Beezer suffered from double vision the whole game, giving up 8 goals in the span of 17 minutes before being pulled in favor of Mark Fitzpatrick's body, which proceeded to shut the Oilers down for the next two periods before wandering off into the corner and surrendering a game-breaking empty net goal as Edmonton defeated Florida 9-8. "I was just looking for the water bottle" said Fitzpatrick's body. "I didn't hear the whistle blow or anything. None of this would have happened if I had my own head." Coach Doug Maclean agreed.