2025   
    Home | Scores | Schedule | Standings | Statistics | Predictions | Trades | Teams | About
 

At 7:44 AM -0600 3/16/0, Neil Robinson wrote:
If I were sent to hockey hell, I'd have to watch the second period of that STL-PHO game over and over again.

At 7:58 AM -0600 3/16/0, Doug Wesney wrote:
Er, uh...Dante?

Can you tell us what hell looked like? There are those of us who didn't see the game.

From: Neil Robinson
Date: 16 Mar 2000 07:44
Subject: Dantean Hockey Hell (was: Wednesday (3/15) Results)

   Garth, the great hockey poet, invited
me to join him for a night of viewing,
which usually would have me delighted.
   But at the movies, Raymond Burr's brewing
a murder plot, as Jimmy Stewart sits
wheelchair-bound and too busy with stewing;
   James all but ignores Grace Kelly, who flits
across the screen before planting a kiss
on him, lost in overactive wits.
   In glorious Technicolor, all this
is too tempting; thus I take a raincheck--
Amonte-Mironov's lameness I miss.
   When I get back home, I look for Turek,
and am disappointed to find he's got
a shutout on, but there's one hopeful fleck:
   If by some chance I can win the one slot,
I'll lead--even if Roman nets seven--
and Phoenix has taken shot after shot.
   Fourteen in the first, and I'm in heaven:
Jersey put up twenty-four; in forty 
minutes, Coyotes need just eleven.
   My hopes raised, I'm feeling rather sporty:
should I call Garth and brag about winning
my first grudge match bet? "Hey, nice team, shorty:
   Has Salad triumph set your head spinning?"
But that idea is vile, and prideful;
the hockey gods punish me for sinning:
   Phoenix comes out looking simply awful--
slow, outworked and--can I be a whiner?-- 
compared to 'Yotes, some Ice Dogs look useful!
   While Eastwood serves double-sticking minor,
Phoenix nets no shot; all that can be said
is that I do not feel--at all--finer.
   Sure, it registers somewhere in my head
that the Blues are playing quite superbly,
but all I can feel in my heart is dread.
   By period's end, St. Louis ably
has allowed just two shots, and let me tell
you: my fallen pride hurts me horribly.
   Watch this boringness again? Sounds like hell.