Tony Amonte takes home the honor of Tire of the Week for Week 20. Tony’s play was as bad this season as it was last season until he was traded to the Flyers. In and out of the Damage lineup all year, he could not seem to put the puck in the net—until the trade. In Game 39, he secured a grudge match victory for the Damage and assured that we would be doing these $*&#^*@$ web pages next year by putting up 3 points in a 31.5 - 25.5 win over the BM. He also had a goal in Game 40 to tie the Mighty Mice, 20 - 20.

We spoke with Tony Amonte this week via his interpreter, Mr. Garrison.

Are you happy with the trade, Tony?

Mr. Tony says he doesn’t want to be traded anywhere. Mr. Tony says he wants to stay with Mr. Garrison.

Well, didn't the trade potentially salvage an otherwise terrible season?

Mr. Tony says Die! Rot in hell, you stupid son of a whore!

Hey, I'm just asking legitimate questions.

I think that you should have a talk with your sailor-loving mother before you start claiming legitimacy.

So what exactly is your relationship with Tony, Mr. Garrison?

Mr. Tony stays with me and helps deal with the stupid children and their %&^%$ questions.

So you teach children?

If you can call these devil spawn children.

So why are you here? Tony speaks English and you don’t appear to know anything about hockey?

Don’t listen to him, Tony. We’ll be together forever.

[TA] [weakly] kill me...

Mr. Tony is such a kidder. We’re going to take Mr. Tony home and throw him in the dryer again if he doesn’t learn to be quiet while I am talking.

Your reporter then ended the interview. I would have tried to save Amonte, but he was such a lousy Monkey last year that I think he's getting what's coming to him.