Week 13’s Tire of the Week is Mike Grier. Here at Tire of the Week, we’re not all about high scoring—sometimes it’s just about bettering yourself. Mike Grier has a measly .67 ppg but managed an assist against the Slapsticks AND the Monkeys in Games 25 and 26. Unfortunately, his points weren’t enough as the Damages suffered losses by one and two points respectively.

After my recent capture and torture by the dark forces of Planet Luck, I was more than happy to return to the hockey rink to receive a blessing from His Eminence, Mike Grier.

So Mike, big week.

Yes, I was pleased.

I didn’t know that you were the Pope.

I’m usually just the Pope in the off-season, but it’s been a big year for sin, so I thought that I would help out over the All-Star break.

Being the Pope, that seems to be a far cry from hockey.

It’s really quite similar. I wear a uniform on the ice, and the robes here. If I get caught for penalty I go in the box; if I sin I’m stuck in the confessional. A hockey stick—a cool staff. Helmet—neat little hat. And plus, as the Pope, I get an awesome car and free parking.

I guess I never really thought of it that way. Do you think that being the Pope helps your hockey?

Couldn’t hurt, right?

Well...your scoring average has just been pretty...er...<quietly> bad.

That'll be ten Hail Marys for you!

This interview terminated quickly as I scurried away before His Eminence could drop his gloves.